January Character Interview
Patricia Parrington ~ January 2, 2025
Hello my lovely readers and fellow book-lovers! For those of you who are new here, I, your wonderful host Patricia Parrington, have the pleasure of interviewing characters from books all over the world.
Today we have here with us Joy from the LGBTQ+ contemporary fiction book Joy by Samantha Leigh. Samantha is a full-time tattoo artist with a love for writing. Her first novel came out in February 2024, and she is currently working on a second.
Meet Joy
[Patricia settles onto an orange suede couch opposite her guest and sets down a tray of cookies on the coffee table.]
Welcome to Fable Features! Feel free to have some cookies—I just made them. Do you like to bake at all?
Ooh, what’s in them? Baking has never been for me, actually. I cook a lot, but find that tossing a bunch of herbs and spices into a pot and adjusting as I go suits me far more than the science of baking. I tried to make my girlfriend a birthday cake once, and it looked like a hate crime had happened in our kitchen. Although I do make my dog, Bernie, homemade treats every now and again, but he is a far less discerning judge, considering he also eats socks professionally.
[Patricia laughs.]
Well at least someone will eat your baking!
[She nods at the cookies.]
These are snickerdoodle cookies—cinnamon, cream, and lots of sugar! You say you prefer cooking. What’s your favorite thing to cook?
I love having everybody over for a roast on a Sunday, I think that’s probably my favorite thing to cook. I know it stresses most people out, with all the timings and everything? But I love it, I think the chaos makes me thrive—making a bechamel sauce whilst basting roast potatoes and trying to get your Yorkshires to rise while also maintaining a responsible blood to alcohol level? Not an easy feat.
I’ll bet not. Sounds very fun, though! And tasty.
What’s a crazy concept you believed as a child?
Do you mind if I vape in here? Honestly I can’t stand sucking on a flavored battery, it is literally never not in my hand, but I promised my girlfriend, Erica, that I’d try and quit the big boy cigarettes. God I miss Marlboros.
Certainly!
So, as a child? I guess the first thing that comes to mind is that maybe . . . love would be easy? I think we’re peddled that narrative a lot when we’re young, right? That you’d meet somebody and fall in love and then BOOM, happily ever after? It doesn’t really work like that. Not that I’ve found, anyway.
I think I’d have had far more respect for my father if he had sat me down and said Joy, you’re going to marry a man that you think will answer all your problems, realize you’re a raging lesbian at the age of twenty-seven, then carry out some sort of rom-com scenario where you traipse across the country with your oversized dog in tow to try and win your teenage crush back.
You know? Something like that. At least I could have been prepared for it. God I hate this flavor. Have you ever noticed that vapes with mango in the title just taste like sweetcorn? Once you get onto that it’s hard to ignore.
[Patricia makes a face.]
Yeah, that doesn’t sound too pleasant of a flavor.
Happily ever after sounds nice in books in movies, but doesn’t quite pan out that way in real life, huh? You’ve mentioned your dog earlier—Bernie, right? How long have you had Bernie?
A few years now! He was a gift from my husband. Well, ex husband; as a cure for my depression, can you believe that? I think I was probably angry about that at some point, but you can’t really stay mad when Bernie’s big old Disney eyes are staring up at you. I think if happiness were to take a physical form, it would be that of a golden retriever.
I most definitely agree. Dogs are just amazing, aren’t they?
[Patricia smiles and smooths down the skirt of her dress.]
Our next question is a simple but fun one: What’s your favorite season?
Easy, winter. I love hiding under seventeen layers and going to bed at eight thirty because it feels like it’s been nighttime since three. Bernie loves the winter, too. You’ve honestly never met a lazier golden retriever, sometimes he looks at me like I’ve slapped him when I try and take him for a January walk. He has this way of glancing towards the window and then looking back at you like you’re a moron for suggesting walkies in such treacherous conditions. The conditions being a mild chill and slight breeze. But he’s usually right, being in a sofa cuddle puddle and closing the curtains is a much better option than making small talk with the dog park regulars.
I’d much rather be in a sofa cuddle puddle too!
So far we’ve learned you like cooking. I’d love to hear more about your skills! What are you a natural at?
I’d love to sit here and say something cool like drawing, painting, even dancing or something. But unfortunately, I am powered mostly by PG tips tea and self-loathing. I guess . . . overthinking? I’m definitely a natural at that. Like, send me the most mundane text you could possibly thing of, and I will create seven different scenarios in my head, in all of which you’ve said you hate me and wish we’d never met. I have this ability to break down any interaction to its bare bones, jumble together the pieces, and put them back in a way that makes absolutely no sense to anybody but me. It actually sounds quite exhausting when I say it out loud.
That does sound exhausting! And I think it’s even easier to overthink something when it’s just a text. There aren’t any facial cues to help you out or a tone of voice.
What is your greatest regret?
Ooh, that’s tricky. I guess . . . not acting sooner when I knew what I wanted. I spent so many years unhappy and unfulfilled, pushing down the most important parts of myself in order to keep other people comfortable. I’ve stopped doing that now, and I’m like, a thousand times happier. It’s just a bit of a downer that I spent so much of my twenties like that. So, yeah, that, I suppose. Making myself smaller for the comfort of others.
[Patricia nods slowly.]
Yes, that is unfortunate you spent a portion of your life unhappy. I’m glad you were able to stop making yourself smaller and allow yourself to find what you need to be happy.
Has someone ever done a random act of kindness to you?
One time, I was walking Bernie through Liverpool One, you know the big shopping bit in the city? Well it was early doors, not many people around, and Bernie suddenly decides he needs to take a dinosaur-sized dump outside of one of the nice restaurants. I go to find a poo bag, but realize, in my early morning fog, that I’ve left the house without them. So Bernie is looking at me, all done and ready to trot on as if he hasn’t just left a world ending pile of crap on the freshly cleaned street, and I’m floundering. There are like, one or two people passing by, going to work or whatever, and so I’m trying to make a big show of looking for the poo bags that I know I don’t have, but obviously I’m getting dead eyed by all of them for being such an irresponsible dog owner. I’m about to give up and just sit next to the pile of steaming turd and beg passersby for a poo bag when the lady who was cleaning inside the restaurant next to me opens the huge front doors and passes me a crumpled up bin bag, like one of the huge ones meant for big bins. I probably looked like a maniac scooping up my dog’s excrement with that, but I don’t think I’ve ever been more grateful to be handed anything.
[Patricia’s eyes widen as she listens to the story and she chuckles.]
And of course it had to be a massive amount Bernie left behind for you to clean up, too. What a kind lady! I’m glad you didn’t have to wait and hope someone would help you out.
[Patricia takes a bite of a cookie.]
Let’s return to the topic of food! What’s your comfort food?
That’s easy—lasagna. It’s the thing I make best. If any of my friends come over, it’s the thing they ask me to cook. If I have a party, it’s the thing that will be lining everybody’s stomachs before we drink like we don’t want to live. I just don’t think there’s anything better? It’s got all the best stuff in it. That is a hill I will die on, really. Lasagna is a god tier food.
Mm, lasagna is very tasty. Where did you first learn to make this lasagna?
It started as an absolute horror show in my shared uni kitchen, until then I was a beans on toast girl through and through. But I figured I needed to be able to make at least one meal, you know? So I started throwing things together, figured out what worked and didn’t work over the years, and now, not to toot my own horn, but it’s pretty perfect.
[Patricia nods as she listens, looking impressed.]
I think I’m still at the horror show stage in my own cooking. But perhaps there’s still hope! I’ll have to keep trying.
What’s something you would have a super hard time turning down if it were offered to you?
Will you think me tragic if I just answer that honestly? Because the only answer I can think of right now is a real goddamn cigarette.
Hey, I’ll take an honest answer any day. And that commitment to not getting a cigarette shows how dedicated you are to listening to Erica and quitting them.
[Patricia smiles and stands.]
It’s been so lovely getting to know you, Joy! I hope you are able to continue pursuing happiness and be confident in your choices.
End of interview.
Want to Read More?
Joy’s author, Samantha Leigh, can be found on Instagram, X/Twitter, and TikTok. Her book can be purchased here.
See Ya Next Time
Aaand that's all the time we have today. Thank you, readers, for coming. And thank you, Joy, for letting us get to know you! See y'all next time.
If you would like to submit a character to be interviewed for a future issue of Fable Features, please send an email to linnae.writer@gmail.com with the subject line: Fable Features.
Please note that erotica and content with excessive vulgar language will not be accepted.
If you have questions you'd like Patricia Parrington to ask in a future interview, please submit them to linnae.writer@gmail.com with the subject line: Interview Questions.
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